I always thought about how to have a more meaningful life, and today I’m trying to ask myself some questions to try and understand myself better. What does it even mean to live a life of value?

Is it a life of sacrifice? A life where everything you do, everything you earn, and everything you own is dedicated to someone who needs this.

Is it a life of a profession? A life where you spend most of your life being good at a several similar things and you put that knowledge towards helping others.

Is it a life of family? A life where you only live in order for your family to be happier.

Is it a life of find your own destiny? A life you dedicate to understanding the universe and what it holds for you.

Is it a life of religion or politics? A life that you spend it supporting what you believe in.

I tried different version of all of these lives and never found the answer to that. I eventually ventured into one thing that always drove me within each of these lives. One thing that was in common in each of these stories and helped me be better. It was creating anything of value to others or myself. I felt more in sync with myself and understood what I am doing more. But that’s just me, and that’s me now, not confident that this is future me.

What astonishes me the most is that I was doing this since I was very young, then I just stopped. And during this long stoppage time of what almost counts as a decade, I believe that I lost things that are important to myself and to my identity. It’s a quest into the wilderness of my soul so that maybe I can find some answers. Another surprising fact is that I’ve done this always in Arabic, now a mental barrier is preventing me from writing with it, why? Another question I seek to pursue.

This is why I’m forcing myself to do this. Essentially for myself, and hoping someone else would find value from this.